It is time to stay honest. And what am I going to be talking about so truthfully? What opinions am I going to express? To help juxtapose my truth with a modern and accessible institution, I am going to talk about video pornography. I will be talking not out of my ass, but from my own opinions. It just so happens, maybe unfortunately, that my opinions go against most of the opinions i have been provided with throughout my academic career as a feminist. Some might see that as a problem: I only see an opportunity. I am going to describe my own feeling towards video pornography, as well as how I feel this media fits into the modern feminist perspective of the world.
Before I even go on, I must explain a few things. Firstly, I realize that throughout the rest of this essay I will use the term “sexual aberrations” several times. I want to clarify what I mean by this. I do not mean that having uniquely sexual fantasies or having fetishes is a bad thing, because it is not at all. Who is to judge anybody today and say his or her differences are negative. I only use the term as a describer for the idea of sexual fantasies, fetishes, and practices that are outside the societal norm today. Moreover, I feel the need to describe the title of this essay. My roommate is “poor” because she has had to spend the last couple nights in our room, trying to do chemistry homework while I have porn on high volume blaring on my computer screen. It didn’t take long before she began to elect doing her chemistry in the library instead.
So lets get down to the dirty stuff: What is pornography, and why is it so controversial? The history of pornography starts with the name: pornography literally means the written record of a prostitute. Pornography may be defined as a number of different medias, including printed literature, photos, sculpture, drawing, painting, animation, sound recording, film, video, and videogames. Ironically, sex shows and stripping are not considered pornography since “live action” is excluded form the definition. It isn’t hard to understand why pornography, especially certain types of video pornography, is controversial. Watching others have sex via video pornography, no matter how arousing, embarrasses populations of people. I should say especially if it is arousing. People have an uncanny ability to deny what arouses them.
There have been many movements that are geared towards the abolition of pornography. It isn’t a matter of selective abolition, like the anti child-pornography crusades (which I completely agree with). Anti-porn groups are stripping the legitimacy of large mainstream porn companies and helping aid the definition of porn as a dirty, violence and sex-crime creating institution. Porn stars are considered whores (which by definition they are) and the porn industry is considered an anomaly: an anomaly that grosses billions of dollars each year. In fact, the porn industry has been deemed one of the only institutions not affected by the current economic recession.
So, in a world in which porn is as easy to find as a recipe to bake classic-style chocolate chip cookies, what’s with all the uproar? One could state religion, but arguing with religion is just too complicated. The largest argument against porn is actually the idea that violent porn and other original genre porn leads to sexual aberrations and violent behaviors. Moreover, women feel threatened by pornography because they deem is as a standard too high to achieve, both physically and, well, actually. I’ll touch on that later.
While I do believe that viewers of violent porn probably have a tendency towards violence to begin with, I do not think that porn industries should be punished. In fact, I applaud the video porn industry for furthering the sexual revolution. I wholeheartedly do not feel that pornography should be outlawed or deemed inappropriate for the public because I think that pornography is a healthy thing, a necessity that prevents violence by letting it’s viewers live out certain fantasies in a safe environment that may be inappropriate or even dangerous in real life.
Many people have been able to live out their secret sexual fantasies through pornography, and how could that ever be a bad thing? Vicarious fulfillment of fantasy is a much better alternative than first-hand experience, especially when the fantasy revolves around violence towards women. It is when fantasy and reality converge that violence occurs.
I once read in an old psychology today that new studies had been published stating that dreams are the body’s way of living out its own personal goals that it knows will not come true. Ever had a dream about winning the lottery? That is your body’s way of living out that fantasy so you can feel fulfilled and you wont drop out of work and pursue a career as a professional lotto player. Dreams help ease obsessions, guilt, and even pain. People have dreams about those who have died and the pain is alleviated; you have a dream you got an A on a test so you stop stressing. In my opinion, pornography is the dream of sexual aberrations. Pornography is how people with this yearning and desires deal with the pain of not being able to experience what they truly want to experience first hand.
People will go to great lengths to satisfy their sexual desires. For example, lets look at the case of Mr. Hands. Mr. Hands is the online handle for a man made famous by dying living out his own personal sexual fantasy. Mr. Hands, or Kenneth Pinyan, was just an average American man who enjoyed engaging in sexual activities with full-sized stallions. He would occasionally film his nights with horses and he would distribute these videos among other people who felt the same sexual urge, but didn’t want to risk having sex with horses. One night, the sex went wrong and Pinyan was fatally injured. My point in this story is that it is much safer and “more socially acceptable” to watch someone else have sex with a horse than to try it yourself. For example, in today’s society, violence in men is supported, but when a man wants to pick a fight in a socially acceptable situation, he takes up boxing. He uses the non-social behavior and conforms it to a more socially acceptable one. The same could be said for men and women who watch pornography.
Porn, like most things in life, can only be what the person experiencing it makes of it. For example, who would’ve though those Beatles songs would elicit such a strong response in Charles Manson to the point that he would condone and practice murderous activities? The argument against porn is the same as the argument against violent television and movies. In my own opinion, and this may piss off a lot of people, I truly believe that it takes something from within someone to take a vicarious experience and wish to make it a real one. Don’t get me wrong, there have been many times that I’ve watched movies about an action hero or a drug addict and wished I could either fight crime or live the life of a strung-out loser, but there is always apart of me that says, “this isn’t real.”
Many will argue that violent porn, or “rape” porn contributes to the violence that is geared towards women. While I do agree that if interpreted incorrectly this might be the case, I want to clear up how easy it is to not make that mistake. Most violent porn videos are clearly not intended to be offensive, and most have the word “Fantasy” in the title. The porn industry doesn’t want to condone violence; it is just a supply and demand chain that demands the supply of more and more violent pornography.
In Judith Lorber’s essay “Night to his Day:” the Social Construction of Gender, Lorber examines the idea that gender (like culture itself) is in fact human made and it depends wholly on everyone “doing gender.” She also says “genders are not attached to a biological substratum.” This is most clearly seen in transvestites and transsexuals constructing their chosen gender by “doing” it: walking, talking, acting, and dressing like their desired gender. This gender construction starts, according to Lorber, at birth and on the basis of what their genitals look like. This is called “sex category.” After this fateful discovery, the baby itself is made into their “gender status” by dress, name, and adorations. Pink is the color for girls, while blue is the color for boys; I’ve known that rule my entire life.
It is this idea of GENDER, of being able to experience sex as ANOTHER GENDER that makes porn so appealing. By watching pornography, a girl can live vicariously through the male character as well as the female character. Women can explore their own sexuality by experimenting with lesbian porn, and the same could be said for men and gay porn. To clarify, just because you are gay and enjoy heterosexual porn does not make you a closeted heterosexual: that is the point of pornography; it is a fantasy world where you can be whoever you want and have sex with whomever, however, and whenever you want.
The beauty ideal of pornography can be defined as a genre of beauty. In video porn, the women are always beautiful with big chests, flat stomachs, and perfect teeth and hair. Some women argue that porn makes an unrealistic image and goal of women that can never be achieved, and therefore it is a bad thing. They say that they make men feel that what is beautiful is a sexually aggressive woman. I argue that it is the complete opposite. I much rather my boyfriend or husband watch porn with a perfect blonde bimbo he know he can never have then actually run around in real life. I keep repeating myself but this is a point I am trying to drive home: pornography is a fantasy, and sometimes fantasies have a way of trying to become realities. By living out fantasies vicariously, we can help prevent real-life issues from happening.
I am not naive. I know that child porn is inappropriate, and that encouragement of desensitization, human trafficking, and dehumanization is wrong. My goal is to not support the previous discrepancies: I only want to share my beliefs. For me it is as simple as this: Why should anyone feel like his or her sexual aberrations are anything but normal? Sex itself is an activity that is exactly what the doer makes of it. It’s ambiguous and it comes in so many sizes, shapes, and forms. I believe that it is this fundamental thought, the idea of being able to be yourself in a way that makes you happy, that is an important aspect of feminism and in life itself. I have learned so much in my academic career, but most importantly I have learned that it is ok, nay, it is imperative, that I stick up for what I believe in no matter what the odds are or no matter what the subject. I feel like when I stick up for myself, for my beliefs, for my body, and for my morals, I am being the best feminist I can be. By juxtaposing this feminist ideal to the idea of pornography, how could there even be any bad taste left in your mouth? Sex can be violent, sex can be creepy, and sex can be lovely. Sex can also be a fantasy, and this fantasy is what drives the pornography business to success. As long as there are sexual aberrations and unique fetishes, the porn industry will always reign supreme. Judge not thy neighbor, because you can never be too sure when something strange and unusual might turn you on, too.
